Monday, April 2, 2012

Brief Biography of Bob Biswas

Bob Biswas is the sweetest serial killer ever. Well, he is not a serial killer in the strictest of sense. Contract Killer would be the right term. However, he does have some peculiarities in his character. He has all the oddities to be branded a serial killer

Bob was born in Calcutta in the year 1965. He was born to Mr and Mrs. Biswas and they lived in a small shanty in Kolkata. Mr. Biswas was a clerk in the Calcutta Municipal Corporation. He was also a part time party worker for the communist party and was thoroughly inspired by the maxim "All for one and one for all". Mr. Biswas was a strong disciplinarian as well. He would take great pride in his Bong identity. He would spend hours staring out of the window, pondering upon how the Bong race is second to none intellectually. Tagore was his personal super hero.

So when Bob Biswas was born, the first word that he learnt was 'Namoshkar'. He was taught etiquettes and values by Mr. Biswas rather well.

Life was going all well for the Biswas family. However, there was a twist in the kahaani. Living in the house opposite to the Biswas' was a gangster, Milan Damji. One day when he knocks at their door to collect his regular 'Basooli(Vasooli)', Mr. Biswas opens the door and greets Milan with a polite "Namoshkar". Milan was in a bad mood that day. He shows a middle finger in reply. Mr. Biswas slaps Milan. Milan shoots Mr. Biswas with a revolver. Mr. Biswas loses his life on the spot. Bob’s life is scarred for life(much more than Dexter. How can a guy not say Namoshkar?!!!").

To add to the woes, Mr. Biswas had no insurance. That day Bob decided that he would grow up to be an insurance agent... and a serial killer.
Mrs. Biswas worked in various houses as a maid and raised Bob. Come 1990 and there was a jakaas movie on Box-Office. Agneepath. Bob watched the movie alone in a theater and got inspired. Milan Damji had to be killed.

Rest is history.

Fig: A still from movie Kahaani. Original photograph not available


The life of Bob is so awesome that they made a movie in 2012. They called it Kahaani. It won the Filmfare Best Dialogue Award.
The most deadly dialogue being:

"Namoshkar, Ek Minute... "

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